Birthday of my best friend

29/12/2010

Although we often have conflict,
although I hate the character of him that never acknowledging mistake,
he is still my best friend.

Happy birthday!

PS: This is really my first steak (if I'm not mistaken). Actually I did know that you might have gone out, I just hate that you didn't inform me... and keep it a secret... and I have already planned earlier, so I cooked no matter what. Anyway, it tastes not very good. I'll try to improve next time :D

纸飞机

载着旧的一年满满的思念，

————〉迎向新的一年……

展开新的旅程。

Basketball MY'Games

It has been a long time since I last played in a basketball tournament. I was quite anxious for the game. Luckily, my team CinCai was grouped in the weaker Group B, as one of my teammate involves in the church event on Christmas night, so we can only play all the matches on the following day, after Christmas.

So we won all the matches in group stage and entered semi-final. :D

I admit that I'm not a good captain... I have failed to controlled my emotion and played so clumsy and not fully trusting my teammates, as a result in some situation, it was a total mess and we lost the game in semi final.

We hardly won in 3rd-4th placing, that was also because of my nervousness and it ended up with some messes... My 3-point shoot in the match was 0%! I couldn't believe it so I keep shooting and still no improvement at all. At last I sub myself out as my friends kept signaling me to sub as I have no contribution at all.

My teammates did a very good job, well play. Even Nelson's performance was stunning.

After the game, few things for self-reminder:

• To be a leader, I acquire courage and confidence, trust to my teammates.
• To be sure about my tactics, not anxious; fix in my position and play well.
• To shoot the ball in a good position and pose.
• To be alert, pass the ball accurately and strongly.
• To be flexible, change scoring method or strategy while shooting failed.

Overall, I'm quite satisfied with the result we got -- 3rd place, bronze medal, goes to CinCai :D 

I must say sorry to my teammates for my failed leadership. Let's work harder in the next year event!

Preparing final exam...

After a long period of relaxing...
it is really hard...

Exam set on Thursday, tomorrow is the one last day for me to study...
Get on the study mood!!!

Amitabha... Bless me for a passed, so I can enjoy the celebration of new year and prepare harder for the coming exams afterwards...

赔了夫人又折兵

Defeated in futsal matches and even sprained my ankle.

What a bad day...

blur blur...

又落东西了...

这次是我最心爱的帽子，时常戴的那个adidas帽。

我自己买的，戴了蛮久了，还有些不舍呐... 好念旧的我。

跟上一次落东西的情况一样，又是在我下车时忘了我放在大腿上的东西，匆忙的挤下车，因为车上很多人。如果把帽子放进书包内就不会落了啦！

本来想打电话给车上的senior托他帮我拿，但却没有他的电话号码，也懒得打电话问朋友...

就这样算了。

心想反正不重要，丢了就丢了。现在冬天我也该换冬天的帽子了嘛。

尽管发生过多次同样的事情，还是没法避免事情一再发生。以后，我必须确保身上的东西都放在不被遗漏的地方，还有不再把小东西放在大腿上了！切记！

谈论中-关于爱情

与其说是欺骗，我更觉得爱情必须建立在信任上。

与其互相欺骗，还不如坦诚相对。

保护自己固然重要，却不能因此欺骗对方；

还不如作防备，避免被欺骗。

珍惜当下才是最重要的。

人心会变，

但拥有过的，

相信都是真实的。

经历过，

才能体会。

就算永远的爱是多么不可能，

爱就是懂得珍惜。

就算爱情依附着经济能力，

爱就是一起分担，一起探讨解决难题；

当然，为爱而奋斗。

那一次后我才明白，

爱无需承诺，

只需信任与坦诚。

埋没

真的好想上场打球，但是最后队上依然不换人地打完全三局。

其实我不差，我真得很想很想上场表现。

如果说我开球不过，不稳；我可以很肯定的说我已经找到开球的感觉，多次练习后，已经稳了许多。

好失望，我没法上场表现以证明自己，就被否定了。

在场边一直欢呼，鼓励；期望队友赢球，好让我有机会上场。

赢球有那么重要吗？那队长也从没考虑过那坐冷板凳的队友的心情。说什么放轻松地打，却不给其他队员上场的机会。机会不是没有，是没想过要给吧... 我平常的练习不足于让我获得商场的机会吗？难道我的实力，以我多次练习累积的经验，不胜于新进队友吗？

我更加无法接受的是，我做了万全的准备，热身，练球... 最后还是坐在冷板凳上。我的准备，我的热诚，都白费了吗？

我这样哪像是队中的一份子啊？！最后我队赢了，但我却怎么也无法十分雀跃，我占了多少功劳啊？对强队时，我完全就没上过场。

我曾说过我好想亲手，获得一面真正的金牌。这一次，还是泡汤了。

我尊重我的队长，所以才没在赛前要求上场的机会。现在有些后悔了。要是当初我开口呢？但也许我会更加失望吧。

就算队长说了对不起，我还是无法平复心情；他就是不信任我。练球的时候，我就知道了，“由他吧，他是队中主力嘛，练多点是应该的”；我就默默牺牲了吸取经验，又甚至证明自我的机会。

我是不是应该更勇于表达自己呢，还是默默的承受这感觉。因为不想伤害友谊间的和谐，我并不常把心中的委屈表达出来；就因为这样朋友们都认为我好欺负吧。

我真想要有个好朋友，真正了解我的感受；队长不是，他从没顾虑我的感受；就算是在赛后，也太迟了吧。好失望，队友间没了该有的沟通，信任。

就这样，我觉得我上场表现的机会被埋没了，对于队友的不信任，感到有些失望。

Keep fighting!!!

Twice, I can't pass the practical skill test of my Dermatology...
wtf, there were only 3 questions! So damn easy!

Teacher told me she has chosen the 3 easiest questions to ask me...
hmm, ok I shall answer... this is the best I can answer...
huh?? what's wrong la... I thought that was enough?...

The thing is... I can't answer the questions completely, some important details are lost. I was just so short-minded that I couldn't recall that details... and I got a thing wrong, that is autoimmune action that destroy the dermal substance, are you joking?? infection?!... man, that was how the teacher reacting...

I thought it would be easy to pass... so I can sit for the final exam...

So, once again I failed. It's good that I learn something and remember it forever. Gotta pass next time and keep fighting!!!

*Today, I want to relax la... just for one day and I shall buck up after that...

一连串的失败，咎由自取嘛！

一直找不到，对我最好的读书方式...
读书前说什么要振作，专心。
看到书，读了半个钟就到极限了。
我该怎么办？！！

这几天一直都好像睡觉，
已经试了很多次不熬夜，要早早爬起来读书；
最后还是一直赖床。

读一点，睡一点...
读到的都在梦里了啦，
还记什么啦。

多少次的口试，
面对老师简单的几个问题，
却只能拗出几个字...
慈祥的老师尽管暗自摇头，
还是让我过关了。

好友总会说我
干嘛不准备好来。
好多次了，同样的情况，同样的问题，同样的我还是不能突破。

我是知道我必须真正的用心面对课业上所有的挑战。
都说是挑战了，
但之前的我，却看得象水一样，
读是读了，有没有进脑又是另一回事，
当然要确保读的都进脑了才上考场嘛！
根本就不应该草草了事！

为了一个全新的自己，
我尝试改变了。
唯独读书方面了，
是时候调整时间了，
不能蹉跎时间啊！

面对一连串课业上的失败，
我必须真正的振作了，
真正的用“心”读书！

了解失败的原因，
我重新找回自己，
怀抱梦想的我。

我必须铭记：
我对家人、她、朋友们说过的话，给过的承诺，
家人朋友的鼓励，
已故阿公对我说的话，
还有失去亲人，长辈的痛，
种种遗憾...
这些都是所有能够激励我的人、事、物啊！

加油！

Defeated again...

My beloved bat! How could you malfunction in this important event?!








However, I know this is not the excuse for the failure...


Where is the determination la...

This time is straight sets... lost in final of double event.

I know I have done my best, but still it wasn't my very best, the strokes I made, still lack of strength and confidence.

It is the last time my strongest double opponents pair up in this Malaysian tournament as one of them is going to graduate next year. However, we didn't work very hard to win them...

Personal result: (same as previous tournament early this year) Single - 3rd runner up, Double - 1st runner up.

Realizing that till now, I haven't got a gold medal yet...
I have to train harder, to make my performance constant, never back down!

The defeat in [=O o| O=]

Facing the defeat,
I have to buck up!

The games,
all the matches in my life
are the challenges.

I really have to improve,
the spirit and power,
to drive me
into the confidence.

The controls,
emotion control
and paddle control,
have to be optimized,
so that I know when to attack,
counter attack.

Defense:
calm,
strong,
never say die.

Attack:
firm,
sharp,
yet never overconfident,
stay focus.

Serving:
spiny,
hit the ball dropped from top with spinning friction,
sharp,
focus and be ready to receive.

Receiving:
calm,
stroke with the hard chop,
or swing the paddle hardly,
be tough.

All the time,
never loose the control,
be tough in every step taken!

TABLE TENNIS,
again I've failed to touch the medal of single event...

Sadly,
but I have another chance to prove myself,
the double event -
the aim is GOLD!

That's the spirit,
in my sports,
and in MY LIFE!

婚姻。再婚？

什么山盟海誓

什么天长地久

只在乎曾经拥有。

我们对

再婚的看法

是如何呢？

婚姻是一生一世相伴的承诺， 一辈子的伴侣关系，坚贞不移的夫妻情份， 不论在健康或疾病中 。

这是母亲得知已故好友的丈夫再婚，所写的...

...为她不值...

新婚夫妇在上帝的见证下，对彼此许下誓言。

男人没有女人不能活吗？

再婚，

那么过去的婚姻呢？

或许世上真的没有所谓绝对的事，

无常...

我们还是必须接受，

虽然不认同。

尽管如此

自己的生活，

生命中的绝对，

是自己所能够掌握的。

放眼天下

还是有许多刻骨铭心

的爱情故事。

我们心中的绝对

就放在自己心中，

设在自己的生命中，

哪管得了他人的啦。

:)

给22岁的自己

20101007庆生

22岁的我
我的生日愿望很简单：

告别过去
努力成为最好的我
就像《最好的我》歌词里所写的...

人生的起落
我都要看透；
不管风吹雨打
我坚定的毅力
让我更有勇气
朝梦想前进。

有些话
是每年的这一天都要对她说的：
怀胎十月
把我生下。
分娩的痛
非可想而知。

谢谢您妈妈

全心全意
奋斗
是为实现父母的盼望，
报答父母的抚养，
更是放眼未来
我的责任。

最好的我
相信我能够做到！

My Birthday 2010

20101007

*Joel, the photographer. Thanks :)
22 y.o. birthday in Amalfi Italian Restaurant

The pasta I ordered, seafood pasta. Not bad but it's too salty to me.

*The dishes in the restaurant are quite salty and the waiter is unfriendly. I think we won't consider to go to the restaurant anymore.

Thanks my friends for celebrating my birthday and thanks for the wishes :)
The "surprise" birthday cake from my housemate TKS is nice too ^^

Thanks my friends who remember my birthday and wished me ^^ (though it is not stated in the Facebook reminder; purposely did, for this year :p)

Appreciate ~~

人本来就寂寞的...吗？

人本来就寂寞的...

这句话对吗？

为何我时常觉得如此... ...

我文静不多话，
内心的挣扎又有谁知。

争执，
事后往往觉得自己有些过分。
真的好难控制自己的怪脾气
时不时就会有许多的不满，
或许我必须学会看得开，
学会忍气吞声。

其实我最讨厌争执了
我时常都是“输家”
因为我太“好心”了。

到头来
气
还不是我自己受
何苦。

认清自己，
接受他人。
那么我不入地狱谁入地狱。
或许这句话有些重
但却很深深的刻在我内心；
我可以舍己为人，
不求回报，
但不代表这些都是理所当然，
其实我更希望礼尚往来。

烦
有什么用，
都不能解决事情...

使眼色，
是因为我还蛮讨厌
人们往往所谓的玩笑是某人心中的痛。
坏话当玩笑也就算了，
至少他听不到。

私底下
告劝他不是更好吗。

你说自欺的人最可怜
但有人就是如此容忍对方，
甚至成就对方。

好无奈
知己难寻。

尽管如此
你不时的寒暄
我还是感受到的。
我不会完全的去讨厌一个人
因为我知道
人都是不完美的
我自己的种种缺点
我也清楚。

我会尝试改进，
尝试寻找突破。

感谢你
朋友。

101010 - The day we moved out

Finally we found a new place for staying, on the day, such significant date -- 101010 :)

However, the owner is still staying there until end of this week, so we just moved our stuff and gathered them in the big room, and stay in friend's place for a few days.

Hopefully nothing goes wrong and we shall stay in the new place and won't have to move again coz, it was really lotz of work... ... troublesome.

Anyway, if we found a cheaper place, we shall reconsider... hehe, indecisive...

My new blog

The new blog is for sharing my views while the current blog is still active to write about mainly the voice of my heart.

If u find some of the old posts are missing, they are moved to the new blog and more will be moved.
Check it out :)
http://isee-ishare.blogspot.com/

New blog to be created

I have decided to create a new blog which contains the things I want to share, separate those posts from my current "diary". Some of the posts from current blog will be moved to the new one :)

Then I shall make the current blog more private as the current blog now is searchable.

My birthday... soon :)

I think my facebook wall won't have uncountable birthday wishes on this year... lol. It's because I purposely don't show my birthday in my profile.

I wonder if any friend really remember my birthday... maybe... none??

Well, there are really lots of things to be busy with in this week (even on my birthday as I have to clear my room, according the order from the new owner) and coming weeks... rework classes, and even moving into a new apartment...

We still haven't found a suitable apartment yet, hopefully the owners that we have contacted, reply us.

The reason to shift: The house owner have decided to sell the unit and the new owner will live in the unit and moving in soon.

We are indeed that unlucky... hopefully we can find a better apartment with better owner and not moving again until we graduate as moving is really troublesome!

Amitabha.

We pray, that we can find the new apartment before 12 Oct, the due date...

My new phone: Sony Ericsson Xperia X10

It has been nearly a month since I bought the phone. Overall I like the phone because it is Android :D
The specs are a bit lower than other phones of the same category. I bought X10 just because it is cheaper.
I have considered Nokia N900 but I didn't bought it because I want an Android phone.
N900 is a great phone with high RAM, ROM and internal memory although processor speed is 600Mhz, it is sufficient for the OS Maemo 5. The OS is complicated but it is quite free without much restriction although the choice of applications is limited unlike Android with abundant applications in Android market.

Using X10, I realize that it is really laggy, and lacked of many function that other 1ghz Android phone acquired. I should have buy N900 if I don't have the budget for a better Android phone... ... am i regretting??

While waiting for the upgrade, hoping for the better change, now I still have to wait:
http://blogs.sonyericsson.com/products/2010/05/05/sony-ericsson-xperia%E2%84%A2-x10-to-get-uxp-upgrade-in-q4-2010/
The upgrade to Android 2.1 has been delayed... Last time it said in the end of September, now end of October. Luckily I just bought the phone, so I won't have to wait for that pretty long for the update.
However, I still hope there will be update to Android 2.2, but it seems not so possible...

Android 3.0 has become a miracle, according to this blog post:
http://xperia-x1.com/xperia-x10-could-stop-at-android-2-2/
I was thinking that the phone is good enough for the later upgrades of Google Android...
Sigh... it seems so impossible. Sony Ericsson is still... disappointing.

Forget about it, I think I should cherish for I have a smartphone :D My first smartphone.

 Stylish :)

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.2

2010年 中秋月

The 2 best photos from my trial shootout with...

Sony Ericsson Xperia X10i :D

at the night of 中秋节 aka Mid Autumn (Mooncake Festival)

on 22 September 2010.

搬家

真麻烦。
原本以为可以住到毕业...
这时候屋主竟然要卖掉屋子，
我们被迫搬家。

两个礼拜的期限，
希望可以找间合适的屋子...

（续）最好的我

标题“最好的我”。
就是这一首歌：



这首歌
道出了我的心情，
反映在内心的世界。

努力做最好的我！
更希望你能感受到这首歌的意义。

我一定会从失败中站起来！
尽管学业艰辛，
也要更刻苦，
更坚持到底！

最好的我们，
为梦想，
为希望，
奋斗！

在这一天祝你
生日快乐。

最好的我

中秋节快乐！！！

月圆人团圆。
虽然未能与家人团圆的我；
远在他乡，心亦相连。

游子
每逢佳节倍思亲。
我也这样过了多少个中秋佳节．．．

家人的盼望，
将来的我要学成归乡．．．

时间过得好快。
两个星期了...
短短的这些日子却让我遇到了不少的小挫折。
不及格，
生病，
丢失物品...
还好幸运的我，竟然失而复得。
（朋友在路上捡到我遗失的学生证。）

我的惰性一直是学习的障碍，
不及格也是我活该。
那时每一天班上的小考，
不过关的话，只要在补课时段考个口试就可以了。

不如意的事，
都会过去的。
决心要做到更好才是最重要！
要加油！

心想
快告别二十一岁的我
这一年内还发生蛮多，
生命的转捩点，
生活中的挑战，
让我一夜长大。

学业
爱情
我想我是不能兼顾了。
不想最后两头空...
若这样我可以更专注于学业上，
我会努力，
达到我的目标，
我自小的梦想！

振作，
就从现在开始
每时每刻
确定目标
坚持不懈怠！

知识是医者救人不可或缺的！

将来的我一定会学成归乡， 

成为家人盼望已久的骄傲！

待续．．．　中秋节聚餐要开始了！

你不知道的事

... 只希望你能够明白...

人生无常

回忆
近年，甚至最近，
发生在周遭的，我所体验的，又或是朋友所经历的... ...
切身之痛
-- 失去至亲、挚友的痛。

感慨
人生无常。

请好好珍惜身边所有的人！

Pulau Carey Mission Trip

I want to thank Moscow Fellowship and Jubilee ministry of DUMC for giving us the chance to join the mission trip.

We went to visit 3 kampung orang asli. Kg Bumbun, Kg Jugra and Kg Judah. The villagers are orang asli tribe Mah Meri. The smallest kampung is Kg Jugra where there are only 5 families. In Kg Jugra, there is no electricity and no proper road. The houses are simple and small. 

What I've learnt from the trip is to cherish.

The villagers are poor, however they live happily in the village. It is so happy to see their smiling face all over the time. They welcomed and treated us very friendly.

I'm touched to see that the whole family helping each other and live with harmony. They are peaceful villages.

However, the villages are less hygienic with the trashes lay all over the place, and there are many bottles and containers which accumulate the water. The drains are blocked.

Many diseases that the villagers suffer from is caused by the unhygienic state of the place they live, especially skin disease.

Our jobs there are distributing drugs and supplements to the villagers and also educate them in proper hygienic life style, nutrition and family organization and of course the Christian works, prayers and other.

It is a nice experience and we have the opportunity to train our clinical skills. However, we can't prescribe most of the drugs as we are not licensed doctors.

We was surprise that the villagers are very friendly to us as we were told before they actually don't like visitors as they regard visitors as strangers. However, by the help from Batin (head of the village), we were able to visit those family with health problems.

For Christians, from this mission, they have served God for God created all man kind and we should help each other. For non-Christian like me, I'm glad to learn about the lifestyle of orang asli and help them in the simple way that we are able to.

There was a session for us to educate the children. They are cheerful and happy to learn. We had a great time playing with them.

Everyday we have "caduk teh" (bahasa mah meri) or tea-break which prepared by Pak Roslan, the first villager we encountered with. We always gather in his house before we start our job. After job done, we go back to his house and tea is prepared for us. We appreciated it so much.

Thank you Pastor Mohan and brother John Teo who fetched us around the kampung during our trip in 5 days.

Other than the working time in kampung orang asli, we enjoy our free time. We had great lunch and dinner everyday, durian, seafood, crab... (wow) I think it is not a good manner for us to enjoy like this since we are there for a mission work... but it is ok to have some fun after the great job we have done. Moreover, after we leave Malaysia, we don't have the chance anymore :p

It is a great experience as I always wanted to involve myself in charity work and this is a good start for me :)
I learn to see things in different perspectives. I hope I can join the charity work again in the future.

回想

回想

那时

为自己编造的理由，

无论如何

还是理由……

…… 我的自私。

Reveal encrypted text:

因为想让自己好过些，
才写了几段文句，
心情写照，
post在Facebook上...
想让朋友们知道我分手的心情。
得到了许多负面反弹，
谴责。
最近有个朋友又提起了这件事，
勾起了这一段回忆。

其实我也晓得
她多少会受到伤害
但我以为
她会了解……

一再回想，
我根本就不应该让她哪怕有多一丝的伤害，
因为
分手
已经是很大的伤害了……

为了得到安慰
我让她承受了压力，
我好自私。
我不了解女生，
我竟然增加了对她的打击……

无论如何
事情都过去了
我并没有狠心抛下她，
我很希望我们还是朋友。
我们一直是朋友
因为
其实我们并没有深爱过对方……

我无需解释，
我的为人
就让朋友去评判吧……
事情都发生了
解释越多
误会更多。

I'm BACK!!! 我回来了！

Thanks to Buddha blessing... I've passed my exam and finally can enjoy my holidays :)

Welcome HOME... my sweet home :)
The longest ever period of time I leave home -- 11 months.
Finally, I'm back.

The feeling was great...

After 1 year... still nothing much changes in JB and the Taman I live... macam same jer, except that JB Sentral now open and the Iskandar project is on-going (wondering if the bridge will be successfully built...)

The most excited thing to me is FOOD! lol. However, I really don't know which food to start with. haha. too many food I want to eat...

Anyway, hope that I can enjoy my holidays, as this is my last summer holidays in Malaysia... I've planned not to come back for next two summer b4 I graduate. I want to go euro-trip!  :)

Full Metal Alchemist: Brotherhood

Finale: Episode 64

This is one of my favourite anime.

The story about the journey of the Elric brothers to gain back the things that they lost...

SYNOPSIS
The foundation of alchemy is based on the law of equivalent exchange; you cannot produce something from nothing. As such, alchemy is bound by one taboo - human transmutation. Four years ago two young brothers, Edward and Alphonse Elric, broke this taboo when they tried to resurrect their dead mother. During the process Al's body disintegrated and Ed lost his leg. In a desperate attempt to prevent his brother from disappearing completely, Ed sacrificed one of his arms so he could affix Al's soul to a suit of armor. When his missing limbs are replaced by auto mail parts, Ed bears the name of the Fullmetal Alchemist - the youngest ever State Alchemist and dog of the military. Now, alongside his brother, Ed uses his status within the military to attempt to find any way that he can return their bodies back to their original state.

http://www.anime-planet.com/anime/fullmetal-alchemist-brotherhood

Quote in end of finale

A lesson without pain is meaningless. You cannot gain something without sacrificing something in return. But once you have withstood the pain, you will gain a heart that is stronger than everything else. A Fullmetal Heart.

Edward Elric

http://metanorn.kokidokom.net/2010/07/fullmetal-alchemist-brotherhood-64-end/

Indeed! No pain, no gain. We should understand our path, the target, reach it and undergo the toughness, the things we have to sacrifice, the time, the sadness of separating with the people we love. Let's prove ourselves that we can do it!

General Hygiene exam

Finally i finished the paper today - General Hygiene...

Although I have the questions and answers for preparation of the paper, I just didn't have the mood to study so I didn't memorize well everything. I just study through once.

The formula, the normal value, reports...

The weather is so damn hot, during the exam, I can't even focus and write my test properly!

The time is obviously not enough for most of the students! 90 minutes given to complete... 150+ questions???

WTH!

He grabbed my paper away, only allowed me to write the number of my variant.

Forget about it, this is not an important subject after all... Hope I can pass, that's all. Pray hard...

Happy holidays! It's better for me to think this way :)

我要回家！

就要回家了！
倒数
4天……

先准备好明天的考试吧！
加油！

Lucky Star - 幸运星的眷顾

PS: KS remind me that most of our friends can't read chinese... so I add at the top of the post...

The most important point is that somehow I feel guilty to have the mark in OS, as that is not the mark I should get, as I didn't expect for that. I really think that I did not good in the paper. I'm just lucky. I have the experience b4, to fail the paper b4 holidays back to M'sia. I know it sucks. What I gained from that experience is that as long as I have given the second chance, I cherish it and try my best to study even harder. (However, I've failed to concentrate in preparation for resiting in M'sia :p) Anyway, good luck :) Well, my friends. sorry for this afternoon, I didn't know about the mark of everyone... I should have been considerate... Here, I pray for everyone who has to resit :) all the best!

忐忑的心
等待考试成绩出炉...
终于这一天到了！

从老师口中得知我的成绩，
我愣了一下，
（但没有很明显的显现出来）
竟然及格了！
而且是一等！

难以想象，
我真地认为我做得不好，
许多问题都只回答对一半，
剩下的都是乱编的！

就这样，早已有心理准备接受，
不及格。

出乎意料。
幸运吧，批改我的考卷的老师没有另外一个老师严格，
而是超“松”的！

得到这样的成绩
却没有非常兴奋的心情。
而是觉得有些不应该，甚至内疚。
毕竟不是我应得的分数。

好不好意思，
意外的我竟然还向另外一批给那严格老师批改的同学
报告我的成绩……
那时我不知情嘛。
觉得我好不会做人。

我也曾经有过考试不及格的经验，
我也早已习惯了，接受了
这考试制度的不公平等等。
所以我也不去在意这些分数了。

朋友，
我了解你们的感受，
想说声对不起……
我为你们祈祷，
加油！
再一次，一定可以过关的！

就这样
得到星运星眷顾的我
放下了心头大石。
还剩最后一张试卷，
过了，就可以享受假期咯！

Pray for PASS!

Praying hard for just a pass in my Operative and Topographical Anatomy final examination...
Amitabha.

100th Post!!!

Well, I need inspiration to study!
The 100th post, the time for me to buck up, back to study, the final dash!
Final paper, less then 48 hours to go...

Hours ago, I was still watching World Cup final and was very disappointed that Netherlands lost...
Arjen Robben had failed to grab the great chances to score!?
(I was disappointed b'cos I lost the chance to win back the money I lost...)

Forget about it, I know there is a more important task for me... to study hard for the coming paper!
I will definitely pass! I want to enjoy my holiday! I CAN DO IT!

I still need the luck, of course. Like usual, it is always the matter of luck... However, I shall do my best to study as much as I can.

缅怀

当身边的亲人逝去时，人往往会缅怀过去…
失去亲人的痛楚我也感受过… 所以也就能体会我一位朋友的感受……

人总要向前看的。
过去的，失去的，亦不能复返。
珍惜现在所拥有的，勇敢地面对将来。
相信他在天之灵会为你的勇敢感到欣慰与骄傲。
朋友，加油！

Dandelion

The new background: Dandelion

When it is spring, we can see a lot of dandelion...
Although it is quite annoying that the flying dandelion irritating the nose, I love to see them flying in the sky, just like the snowing...

I started to notice more on dandelion only when I reached Russia. We can't see many of them in Malaysia.

蒲公英的约定
一起长大的约定
那样真心与
你聊不完的曾经
而我已经分不清
你是友情

还是错过的爱情

不管蒲公英种子漂泊多远，

飘到何处，

都不会忘记当初离开那一刻的幸福与甜蜜。

这就是蒲公英的约定

——代表幸福的约定…

蒲公英象征着自由，清纯，坚强。无论前途有多么坎坷，它总是能借助着风的力量，挺过来。
Dandelion symbolizes freedom, pure and strength. No matter how the route is, it gets through it with the help of the wind.

GO NETHERLANDS!!!

What a great performance in World Cup to win over Brazil!!! Keep it up and win the cup!
Holland can do it!
Believe it! Wohoo!

:D

Final exam in 2 weeks time

Guides:

5 Ways to Increase your Productivity by Working Smarter | Student Help Forum

Time to STUDY HARD!

CONCENTRATE! don't fall asleep...

I CAN DO IT!

Remember Me (2010)

This is my first post about MOVIE!
This is the title of the movie that I mentioned in previous post.

I like to watch this kind of movie, romantic and inspiring. It makes me think and refresh myself.

At first, I thought it is a romantic love story. However, I realize that the movie, is not only about love of relationship, there are many other essence of life, brotherhood, parental love, the interaction between people, the impact on a person after certain tragedy and many more.

At first I also didn't know what is the movie based on. Until the last scene, it is the surprise to me.

It is worth to spend a little bit of time to refresh. We should cherish everything we have presently, do whatever we think we want to do as soon as possible, even right now, before it's late. It's because, life is unpredictable.

Remember Me, remember everyone who has walked together with us in the path of our life.

Happy Father's Day

I purposely waited till the morning time in Malaysia just to make the call home to wish my dear daddy, "Happy Father's Day!!!" :) It was 3.30 am here. I had just finished watching a nice movie. I shall share the movie review in next post.

So funny, my mom said she just had a dream and woke up not long ago before she picked up my call. In the dream she was taking a train in... Russia??! lol I guessed she's missing me too much :p

I'm going back home! 5 more weeks to go! However, 4 weeks to go for final exams... better get ready soon!
Miss everyone back in Malaysia so much... This will be my last visit back to home before I graduate. I won't return back in 2.5 years time. It's long but I think I can endure :)

SO, I want to fully enjoy my holidays!
Shall pass the paper first, and MUST pass!

Convocation in Summer 2010

17 June 2010:  The convocation of the largest batch of foreign student graduates in the history of KSMU. - 200+ graduates from Malaysia, Sri Lanka, India, Nigeria and other countries.

It was my first time to attend university convocation here and in my life.

It was grand. Although I couldn't enter the hall as there were full or graduates and their family members, there was a lecture hall for us to watch live broadcast.

The ceremony was honorable. I was impressed by the speeches and the oath taking ceremony.

I enjoyed to observe the pride and joy of the parents, proud of the achievement of their children. When my day comes, I shall let my parent be really proud of me as well!

Congratulation to all the seniors who have just graduated! May all of you to be successful in the great perspective path and have a bright future in the field of medicine!

2.5 years later will be our time! So, before that remarkable moment, I shall study hard, to obtain as much knowledge as I can... to strive hard in order to achieve the target of my life! That aim shall be the priority of my life, and no more bother of anything else!

追悔；擦身而过...

突然脑海浮现一段词：“生命有一种绝对”．．．ｂｙ五月天

人生中想追求的东西很多，也不是每一件都会成功，失去的也许再也不能从来．．．

绝对，除了最终的目标，生活周遭包括亲情、爱情、友情，人事物．．．都有一种绝对。

只要活在当下，了解过去因果，进而改进，用于未来，生命的绝对定是所期盼的。

那么，珍惜现在，反省过去，勇敢面对未来！

单恋

虽然不是第一次了，

却是最认真想要恋爱的第一次．．．

看清原来是单恋时

还蛮心痛的，

但很快地也释怀了。

难行能行，难舍能舍，难为能为，才能升华自我的人格。
【感谢天意】若常常受到挫折，也要感谢天意的磨练。
【忍辱】人若能面对现实，欢喜接受过去生中的善恶业缘，谓之「忍辱」。
【看开与知足】所谓看开人生，不是悲观，而是积极乐观；不是看破，而是看透；并非什么都不做，而是能及时行善；也不是什么都没有，而是什么都知足！
~ 静思语录

会追悔，会认为那是擦身而过，

因为感觉是真的，

却没有表示。

错失过的种种都是因为自己过于胆怯，

也因为无知，

甚至不以为意于某些事情的发展。

其实，

宁可被拒绝，

也不愿藏着情感不让她知。

尊重她，

明白她的选择

是能让她幸福的选择。

我

尽管放弃了希望

内心的感觉

依然不会淡去

时间会冲淡的吧．．．

那么，我们会是好朋友。

只要你快乐，

祝福你
和你的他。

后悔.regret

人言可畏
但我不得不相信了。

回想起点点滴滴
不禁深感遗憾，后悔。

遗憾我并没有表明我的心态；
后悔那时错过了，
没能把握机会
接近她。

不是我没勇气，
是我太不主动了吧。
我应该清楚时机等待
往往落在人后。

我也太天真了，
好多的“以为”。

她的好
哪怕是小事
我都会感受到，
觉得好欣慰。

好多话
想说，
好多话
想谈。
想了解她。

希望
至少还能做朋友吧 :)

再回想
Thinking back again...
I've never take the real action. I was so ignorant to think that was impossible but the problem is that I was too passive to put the effort in it.
I'm so regretting now, so much regret.

Since the beginning I wanted to be friend with her and slowly get closer to her...

The hints, I wonder if she understand...

but all now have gone.

I should have understood something...

Now I know why.

So,
I shall make this as an experience.

The loss... even before I try...

I shall be strong

so I can go further,

strive harder

to make my life better.

Let it go

if

I know there is no hope.

We can still be friends.

The lesson I gained:

- to be more attentive and not missing any of the chance so that I won't have to regret.
- to make the real action but not just sms, online message or even effortless waiting for the chance.
- to call up at least for the first try.

"Underline" CSS and Command

CSS:
refer to "text decoration"
Example:
h1 {text-decoration:underline}

Command:

(u)TEXT(/u) *replace ( ) with < >
shows: TEXT

"New windows or tab" link

To edit a link into which it is open in a new windows or tab, add (space)target="_blank" between " (after the link address) and > (of closing).

Urology: Plan of investigations

Laboratory methods of investigation

• Blood analysis: GBC
• Biochemical test: urea, creatinine, protein, general bilirubin 
• Urine analysis: Proteinuria, Cast, erythrocytes, leukocytes, epithelial cells, bacteria; pH
• bacteriological study of urine (urine culture)
• immunity/sensitivity test
• Glucose level in blood
• Bleeding time, clotting time, prothrombin time
• Functional kidney test: Zimnitsky test

Instrumental investigation

• Catheterization of bladder
• Cystoscopy
• Percutaneous nephrostomy
• prostatomy

Ultrasound

X-ray examination

• Plain X-ray
• excretory urography (Intravenous pyelography; IVP)
• Cystography; voiding cystogram
• retrograde urethrography
• retrograde pyelography

SPECIAL X-ray

• Abdominal aortography
• percutaneous antegrade urograms
• Lymphography
• Inferior venacavography
• miscellaneous urologic angiography

CT

MRI

Radionuclide imaging

Design!!!

This is what I want! :)
New design feature of blogger is available!

I've tried it out, love it!

Untitled 100607

Victor Quek went to sportzal but was informed table tennis training discontinued until next semester... "тренировка больше не будет..." :'(

Sigh, have to wait for so long time to play table tennis again... really miss the time playing table tennis with you :) 

回家了...

这一天
我又发呆了

发呆想的，还是你... 关于你...

发呆...
坐在4号巴士上，
过站，
转进了通往较偏僻的住宅区的路，
好远才停下，
只好等巴士到终站后回转。

一路上
风景、花草树木
还蛮入目的。

一路上
我不时拿起手机，
想传短讯给你...

你会回复吗？

笑

是时候看清自己啦，看开点，不要为这点小事心烦，不管别人在不在乎。
笑一下 :D

Reply

Waiting and waiting...
... but that's all I can do...
Show encrypted text

Password is your birthday YYMMDD

Titled as previous post, translated: I'm rich man, I THREW MONEY INTO GARBAGE :'O

How can I be so blur?!! Keeping the money that my friend requested me to keep as to pay the fees of the following month, I kept them in a small box, separately from the place I kept my money but I put the small box on the table (I even labelled it!). One day I was clearing my table and cleaning around my table as the cactus on my table knocked over and so the table and the floor became dirty. I found the small box on the floor, I totally forgot there is money inside! I took it as rubbish and threw it away.

TODAY, I have to pay the fees, and was searching for the small box on the table and was so frustrating as I just can't find it. My mind is rolling, flashing back where have I put the small box actually, is it possible that I've thrown it into garbage?! Suddenly, I know that MAKES SENSE! I did throw the small box into garbage!!! Damn it! I was nearly crazy at that time... 3000ruble!!! OMG...

I went to the dustbin to dig, although I knew that's impossible to find it as I know I threw it away few days ago. I even went to garbage collecting area to try my luck. But it was too late, few days ago, they have cleared the garbage.
Am I so unlucky?! Shit things happen. This is not the first time I lost something...
Just hope that I can be more and more attentive in everything I do!

Gonna scrimp and save... pinch and scrape...
volleyball, basketball, eating in restaurant and be vegetarian... sigh...

Amitabha

我是“有钱人”，我把钱丢进垃圾桶:'O

我也想把那笔钱捐给需要的人啦！

After thinking so damn long time, I'm gonna CRAZY... It's all making sense... can't believe I accidentally threw away 3000 rub few days ago and till now only I realize!!! shit!!! :'O

无可奈何

当初会做这个决定还不是因为你，现在你什么也没亲口跟我说...
不得不承认了，那瓜葛越来深了。很多时候，很多话我都很想摊开来说，我真的不晓得为什么会如此无可奈何。

一开始，事情已不是我想象的那样了，我还以为我们还是可以相处愉快。久了，我觉得我错了。人心难测啊！为什么我们不能有朋友间的交谈，为什么谈话间会变得有顾忌...
我也不是什么不分轻重的人，真不希望与任何人存在所谓的顾忌。
凡是大事化小，小事化无。
如果你看到这帖，希望你明白我的感受。
好闷...

如果你认为你一定要这样，我也无话可说，只能尊重你。

2010 World Team Table Tennis Championships

Today's HEADLINE! S'pore rewrite table tennis history! Feng TianWei and Wang YueGu, the stunners of China world leading players!!! Amazing Feng TianWei as the comeback queen. Final result: S'pore-China 3-1! Congratulation to S'pore team to end the 18-year domination of China team in women's table tennis!!!

In Men's event, Germany Timo Boll showed his great comeback by winning the first match against Ma Long and fought well in the 4th game against Ma Lin although he lost at last. Germany lost 1-3 to China, China defend the title for the 5th time in row.

幸运草_词

把之前写的“幸运草”改成了歌词，但本人不会填曲，初次写词，好像也不怎么能拿来唱吧...一点心声罢了，一切都已烟消云散了，以此抒发情感。爱词的朋友请多多指教咯:)

（白）

你知道幸运草的意义吗？

第一片叶子代表真爱

第二片叶子代表健康 　　

第三片叶子代表名誉　

第四片叶子代表财富

(A)

那一夜 我彻夜难眠

回忆(起)当初我们

渴望爱 相信爱情并开始爱情

天真 于是我们

坚信爱 刻骨铭心永不会淡去

那感觉 我有口难言

回想(起)当时我们

期望爱 心心相印却没法相见

遗憾 如今我们

放了爱 海誓山盟亦无法兑现

(B)

其实我想说

幸运能够 遇见你

是你的出现

使我感受到 爱一人的感觉

是心中所属 甘愿为她付出

爱情萌芽 在心中

长成幸运草

使我感受到 被人爱的感觉

是心中所属 享受被人在乎

但是我感慨

有缘无分 在一起

幸运草开花

无奈遗憾地 叫人无法等待

久不能相见 不想一直等待

距离时间 亦阻碍

爱情的成熟，

彼此不了解 爱情终不长在

爱情不成熟 始终不会长在

(Chorus)

那是

我们之间隔着的遥远

那是

我们必须等待的长远

那是

我们曾经经历的短暂

以至

少有彼此了解的机会

于是

我们大方地祝福彼此

于是

我们坚强地奔向前程

于是

我们毅然地道别过去

仍是

保留甜蜜回忆作纪念

(A)

(B2)

其实到现在

终于看清 我自己

对你不谅解，

是我恋情中 最最大的失败

如此地变心 我也深感无奈

必须坦诚 我自己

请你原谅我

单方面决定 决心放弃恋爱

无法拟补的 对于你的伤害

那么到最后

献上祝福 希望你

不再去依恋

过往的一切 就让时间冲淡

在风雨过后 天空仍旧晴朗

从今往后 让我们

诚心将爱情

转换了成为 朋友间的关爱

告别了恋爱 依然还是朋友

转换了成为 朋友间的关爱

告别了恋爱 依然还是朋友

Study

I DO NOT WANT to be so dumb in class ANYMORE!

From now on, I must follow all what i list below:

1. to study properly at least 2 hours everyday.
2. always know and understand what I'm studying.
3. to refer to different source for extra information.
4. to revise what I've learned in previous years.
5. to do revision so that I can always remember what I've studied.
6. no procrastination.
7. to plan my time.
8. to wake up early.
9. not to get negative influence from anyone.
10. to think positive.
11. not to compare with other.
12. to concentrate in class.
13. no unnecessary thinking!

Well, I must admit that I'm always lie to myself that I thought I can do like what I have planned. But always failed... Lots of unnecessary thinking interrupt the study progress sometimes.

I won't have to think anything else, any feeling I have currently... other than concentrating on what I'm studying! Thinking unnecessary stuff is really worthless!

I must be able to control the feeling.

It's not too late to change! :)

Adams-Stokes syndrome

It is sudden, transient episode of syncope, occasionally featuring seizures. It is named after two Irish physicians, Robert Adams (1791–1875) and William Stokes (1804–1877).

Before an attack, patient may become pale, heart rhythm pause temporally, and collapse may follow. Normal period of unconsciousness is 30 seconds. If seizures are present, there will be twitching after 15–20 seconds. Breathing is normal throughout the attack. On recovery, patient becomes flushed as the blood pumped from pulmonary into systemic circulation which has become dilated because of hypoxia.

NB: As with any syncopal episode that results from a cardiac dysrhythmia, the faints do not depend on the patient's position. If they occur during sleep, the presenting symptom may simply be feeling hot and flushed on waking.

Diagnosis: History taking, observed paleness prior to attack and flushing, ECG - assystolia and ventricular fibrillation during the attacks.

Cause is loss of cardiac output due to cardiac asystole, heart block, Lev's disease or ventricular fibrillation. The resulting lack of blood flow to the brain is responsible for the faint.

Treatment: isoproterenol (Isuprel) and epinephrine (adrenaline). Surgical - insertion of pacemaker.

Prognosis: untreated - 50% mortality within 1 year of 1st episode. Good prognosis after treatment.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adams-Stokes_syndrome

瘦

瘦了？

越来越多人说我最近瘦了...
家人、朋友...

也许是因为前些日子的问题，又生了一场病，饮食和睡眠也都有问题，才瘦了。

怎样增肥啦？

突然好想有个人煮给我；
或者有个她愿意吃我煮的，也许我就会煮得好一些。哈哈！

Differentiating angina pectoris (AP) and myocardial infarction (MI)

This is my first medical post!

Angina pectoris and myocardial infarction are two serious diseases that are most commonly interchanged. Early recognition of angina pectoris may prevent the condition from developing into myocardial infarction.

In AP, there is pain due to decreased blood and oxygen supply to the heart. Heart tissue goes back to normal when there is enough oxygen supply.
There are stable and unstable angina. Unstable angina can lead to myocardial infarction (these two are known as acute coronary syndrome).

In MI, the tissue actually dies. Heart tissue never return to normal even oxygen is restored. However, there are ischemic part of tissue which there is low oxygen supply, not died tissue. So we can save those "sick" tissue by reperfusion (open those arteries) as soon as possible.

In few words, AP, reversible. MI, irreversible, died tissue.


References:
http://www.sh.lsuhsc.edu/fammed/OutpatientManual/Angina.htm
http://www.earlysymptoms.net/blog/myocardial-infarction-vs-angina-pectoris/
http://www.123angina.com/angina-pectoris/what-is-the-difference-between-angina-pectoris-and-myocardial-infarction-2

有那么难吗？

当我在难以抉择时，就想着一劳永逸吧！

别再为无谓的事，思考多时了！

更不要执著!

切记！

笔记（二）- 幸运。草

想写一段“幸运草”...

在一起的时光

短暂，

以至了解彼此的机会

稀少。

无知的我
曾坚信

我们的爱

不回淡去。

现在才发现，
渐渐地明白
我们的爱

原来

不会持久，
我们终将会分开。

遇见你
真的好幸运。

若不是你的出现，
我不会感受
爱一个人的感觉；

爱在心中萌芽，

长成幸运草。

遗憾的

我们将不会等待

草开花的那一天。

距离与时间

成了爱情成熟的阻碍；

不成熟的爱
始终不会长久。

其实，
到头来

我才看清自己
一直以来对你的不谅解，
是我在这段恋情中最大的失败。

原谅我，

对你的坦诚、
所造成的伤害。

最后
献上最深刻的祝福：
平安，幸福。

笔记（一）

某天在纸上写的笔记... 

希望
她真的明白
我们分手的原因
不是我们不爱彼此了，
而是我开始觉得
把爱转为朋友之间的关爱，
我想
会更好。

尽管如此，这段期间内不联系，是不想让她依恋。
一直到我回国后，再见依然是朋友。